MISSION: HNY 2015

Salam Tahun Baru!!

It's been a while that i have stopped blogging..dah dijangka memang jenis buat kerja separuh masak!! hehehe..huhuhu.. It's 1st January 2015, so i decided to write again as i feel relax, restart & refuel physically & spritually.  Masyaallah, how fast time flies??? 2014 berlalu sepantas kilat.. It was like yesterday since I moved to Menara U Shah Alam, rupa-rupanya dah genap setahun jadi SA Resident.. heard from someone who told me that masa berdetik macam biasa, cuma manusia terasa ianya berlalu pergi begitu pantas apabila tak menggunakannya dengan sehabis baik!!  So much true.."Demi masa...."

Looking back in 2014.. it has been a hard & sad year for Malaysia as well as for me.  Double tragedy involving MAS, fallen of Ringgit Malaysia and we ended with disastrous flood & another Malaysia-owned flight Air Asia QZ8501 crashed !!  A very sad ending...Ya Allah..Dugaan besar & berat untuk Malaysia.. Saya yang hanya diduga dalam PhD ni pun dah separuh gila rasanya, apatah lagi to those people affected by those tragedies.. lebih besar dugaannya..

Yesterday, while doing my routine in the postgraduate room and as I realised its already 31st December - the last day of 2014, I told myself that I should have done better.. I must admit that there were sooo much of negative vibes within myself through out the year!!..and the negativity list goes..

I didn't do well in my study (obviously)

I didn't see my supervisor (instead he came to me & even asked me "dah makan ke belum"?? - shame on me), 

I kept worrying over the same old shits, 

I felt traumatized everytime I switch on my lappy, 

I practiced poor unhealthy lifestyle - my last work out was around March and eversince, I didn't go for swimming, gym, yoga & all sorts of active regime which I enjoyed previously

I sat on  the swivel chair & staring my laptop 24 - 7

Sleeping on the chair & in the car has become common.. If it happened on my proper bed, it's either last for only 3 - 4 hours or maybe I got overslept and only woke up at 8 am..Suboh gajah..Suboh dinosour dah jadi routine pulak..how sad!!

I easily got sick & unable to heal fast..until today, already had hoarse voice for about 3 weeks!! 

Sitting for long period of times leads me to hemorrhoids...huhuhu

I didn't eat well - after brekkie, I tend to skipped lunch & instead, I snack over junkfoods, sweets & chocolates and only had my dinner at 10pm!!

I managed to loose 4 kilos of my weight during Jom Kurus 1 Malaysia (JKIM) programme earlier this year & I ended gaining 12 'damn' kilos...HOHHH!!!!???

Now tell me.. how should I stay positive when sooo many things went wrong???? (cry..cry..cry..)

Eventually, my senior Kak Iza came in to the room and I was actually didn't know what was her real intention at first.. but she said that she felt sorry to see my tense face everytime she passed by the room from outside, muka penat, mata dah ke dalam, kulit muka pon x glow (yess, I've been neglecting my facial care these days & some more dah tak bermekap as usual).  In her loghat utara she said that "duk pulon gheja dari pagi ke pagi esok tapi tak siap2 jugak" and neglecting your health & your social life, is sooo not worth it!!  Furthermore, you didn't make use of your jovial personality and you end up isolating yourself silently in this room!! Sepanjang "spiritual chatting" ini, banyaklah nasihat2 kerohanian yang dititipkan..Kata Kak Iza..PhD ni cuma duniawi, what's more important is jalan dalam proses PhD itu sendiri adalah menuju kepada jalan Allah SWT, jadi kenapa perlu belakangkan Tuhan??!!  Subhanallah, betapa tipisnya iman saya rupa2nya.. saya bermusuh dengan PhD, saya benci dengan takdir ini, saya seperti salahkan Tuhan, PhD buatkan saya jauh dari Allah, sembahyang lewat waktu kerana nak habiskan serangkap write up, solat yang tidak berkualiti akibat tergesa2, tak sungguh2 berdoa, ada kalanya tak berdoa langsung..Sekalipun my ibu dah ingatkan..sebab itu lah kejayaan, rezeki sampai lewat..kalau dah solat pon lewat..Ini antara yang dikongsi Kak Iza during our "spiritual session";-

1. Solat 

- Solatlah di awal waktu

- Solat sunat taubat selepas solat fardhu (sebab kite memang tak sedar/perasan dgn dosa sendiri)

- Solat Dhuha supaya murah rezeki

2. Baca Al Quran / Doa

- Doa bersungguh2 & minta Allah yg besar2 (percaya kepada the power of Doa)

- Baca surah Al-Fajr sebelum matahari terbit

- Baca surah Al-Waqiah setiap hari (supaya tidak papa kedana)

- Baca surah Al-Mulk setiap hari (supaya kubur bercahaya)

3. Perbanyakkan sedekah (jangan kedekut bagi singgit2..bagi lah besar2 sikit..kesian org banjir, harta benda hilang, 1 sen pon takde, kite masih bole makan KFC lagi)

4. Ringan-ringankan mulut berzikir..bukan lama pon..3 minit je..

5. Study Life

- Ikhlaskan hati dalam menuntut ilmu kerana Allah SWT, bukan kerana gaji, pangkat @ title

- Datang ke postgrad room awal & balik awal so that you'll have time to exercise, bersosial & baca Al-Quran.

- Tidur awal (waktu terbaik bangun jam 230 pagi then tidur balik jam 4 pagi then bangun semula jam 6 pagi) - yang ni macam SUSAH je nak direalisasikan..hahah

- Outline your goal in your study.  Jangan stuck terlalu lama at one spot!! Buat lain..
- Mingle around.. speak to others about your study..don't do it alone!!

- Kurangkan surprises in your life (contoh teragak nak ke Hong Kong esok terus beli tiket flight) sebab takut tak cukup masa nak prepare & jadi kelam kabut!!

6. Work your plan..plan your work (ni tambah2 sendiri..) gagal merancang adalah merancang utk gagal!!

Alhamdulillah..Allah utuskan orang baik & positif untuk tunjukkan jalan kepada saya.. in fact all this while I have been surrounded with kind & positive people, it just that having myself as my worst ENEMY, i seldom see the beautiful parts that lies behind.. Terima kasih Kak Iza .. it's been soo long that I haven't been attached to Allah..satu permulaan yang baik untuk saya hari ni!! Saya tak punya resolusi tahun baru, saya hanya berdoa semoga Allah jadikan saya lebih kuat menempuh dugaan, lebih baik dalam pengurusan solat & hidup serta jadikan saya individu yang lebih terampil luar & dalam...Wassalam...

Apa kene mengena video ni??hehehe...simply because SRK is my idol, apart from his movies, I always seek for his motivational & inspirational quotes & lived with it!! Yang tersirat dalam trailer ni pon ade kene mengena dgn saya...lu pikirlah sendiri!! HNY 2015!!